Take Courage

It is heartwarming to know that someone cares
That someone listens despite who you are
Despite the flaws that you try to hide
But shows up eventually

In the years when you have to take courage
And be strong amidst the piercing eyes of people
It is amazing how you can stand up
In the pool of shame that people think of you

But sad to know that some are not strong enough
For the may have not given enough time
Or space
Or even shelter
For them to be at peace with their hearts
And for once take courage to face the day
Of a world full of hate and hypocrisy

But you are not alone
For I may be on the other side of the world
But our hearts are as one
Beating the same language that they can’t even understand
And when they can’t follow its rhythm
They start to shoot arrows and push daggers
For we are not one
With them

If they could only understand
If they could only feel the way we feel
If they could only be in our shoes
If they could only be

But they can’t
But they aren’t
So they will never do
They will never be.

So let us not waste tears for sorrow but for joy
Rejoicing the day that we can survive
And live the way we are
Who we are
For who knows when our time has come
And may God bless it
We are glorified with Him in heaven
For the faith
And the fruit of it
And when it’s all done.

Take courage, you are not alone.

In the bleak morning of Winter

The autumn leaves are slowly falling
And the chilly air is getting colder
Soon the snow will cover the mountain ranges
And my breath will blur the crystal window

Then I’ll find the silence empty
And the heat is not warm enough
To cover this small room built for you
In this early winter evening

While friends gather in the hearth of fire
I watch the smoke of the nearby chimney fly
Through these years I wish we are together
If only time will allow us by

In the morning of freezing winter
Your pillow is my only comfort
The sun has spread his joys to welcome strangers
Behind my window sheets

Then the morning after
There will be no new story told
No more milk for dear coffee
But black and bitter as of old

In the bleak morning of winter
Friends gather by the forge
To play games of young and old, I wish
That we’re together, if only time can lie.

Under the Autumn Sun

Under the Autumn Sun

a butterfly flutters in the midday green
searching for flowers nowhere to be seen
sailing in the breeze of an autumn wind
that chills the morning dew beneath its wings

above a lone bird chirps on a tree
waiting for something it can never see
singing a song as sweet as it can be
as the leaves slowly falls from an autumn tree

cold wave splashes on a wooden wharf
on its edge a man sits as though it’s his turf
he stares at a canoe dancing with the ebb
whistle’s a song that gives grace to the act

from afar a cry resounds in the place
a chill of longing, an echo of haste
from the stillness of every thing and silence of today
to the uncertainty of morrow a beautiful chaos is made

as dusk splatter on the canvass of the day
synthetic lights glisten at the quay
following the street lamps he walks on cobblestones
another day is done and he walks home alone.

Hey Sister

Too much nonsense and I say adieu
to every night when I go blue
what to you is a moment gone
and there is nothing left to be done

hey sister what shall ye say?
Can you fill me up? I’m empty these days
just help me up and make me fine
from the poison of my lover’s wine

I beg not look into my eyes
or you’ll see dark rivers and body of lies
intoxicate me in thy euphoria
and blind me from my love’s aurora

hey sister, what do you say?
Can you fill the emptiness of me these days?
Just let me know, I’m ready to go
‘coz I’m stuck here and ready to blow

I dare you not trust my true intentions
just play with me so I won’t hurt your emotion
let’s enjoy the ride into oblivion
what happens to-morrow is mine’s obstruction

so sister what can you say?
Are we ready to go, are we ready to play?
All these is a game, I hope you’ll stay
let’s not talk about forever but live for today

forgive me from these gibberish talk
for lately I can’t seem to walk
now I live in mire and I feel so filthy
my lover’s gone, I’m feeling guilty

a fool I am, I made to myself
forgive me sister I can no longer hide from my shelf
this love has taught me much of how
now I can no longer love somehow.

Song Of Jonah

help me dry these tears away
by simply telling me you’ll stay
afraid to lose now that I hold
this treasured soul none can be sold

when he comes will you choose to go
leave this moment we both know
when he promises to dry your tears
will my caress not make it clear

if your heart have made up so
please close the door before you go
and gently kiss the night away
to let me know I had you some way

but if you choose to stay with me
will my heart rejoice and sing?
oh, how lovely that day would be
when all the chimes and bells would ring

but dear heart the choice is yours
let not my lamentations alter
for what is it to me if I have you
when you choose to love the other true

just let this song pass away
though you’re in my heart each night and day
this help ease my pain somehow
so I could write not a poem of sorrow.

When Life Sucks Sweet

Oftentimes, the world offers so much fun that in a blink of an eye it was gone. You wouldn’t notice it. Probably because we were so engrossed with the happiness it offers us or maybe because we really tend to enjoy the moment knowing that it is fleeting and thus taking the most out of it.

I’ve realized lately that one of my fears is losing someone. Romantically or not. The reason people look at me as mysterious or very secretive to the point that they call me “suplado” is because I seldom trust people. But when I do, I tend to establish an invisible thread among them and in so doing, I easily give in and open up everything about me (most of it). Once I establish this connection, it would be very hard for me to cut it, except when trust is broken. –or you can blame it to my temperament.

These past few days, I’ve been so yoked at being myself and enjoying much of it. And then, here comes people whom I’ve met before, loved and established connection with. Our paths crossed and just when I thought I was over everything, poof – there goes the beating… dub dub.. dub dub… dub dub… but what else can I do? It’s been over and done and there’s nothing I could do to probably win them back… how I wish they have a heart like mine that makes one stiff as a statue in the middle of a crowded mall when he sees his crush. – well, this is too shallow and cheesy – but mind you, it’s true.

On the other hand, I know that this fear of losing special people – I call them “special” because only a few of them really stands in that small circular region I call friends – would soon be overcome, but just the thought of the process of losing them is already quite hard. What else can I do? Either it’s because of some unavoidable circumstances, others because of priorities and most of them just because it’s over. The first two are understandable but the latter needs specific explanation as I may not be able to understand the silent treatment, sudden disappearances or just simply tell me that I’m thin, dumbass and ugly.

Also, I’ll be turning 28 this Friday and I’ve been thinking that I haven’t been productive at all. It feels like I’ve enjoyed much of my 6 years after graduation in college just enjoying the life of being single and now that I’m turning 28 I should be more mature and take on the ride of a life sentence – marriage. Well, I cannot deny the fact that I have my share of this fashion of flirting and “paniningalang pugad” and I must say they were true to my heart and what I feel but I still can’t imagine myself being married and do the responsibilities that goes with it. You must be thinking I would be a spinster which I WILL NEVER BE. The thought of having children thrills me, what would they be like, would they be as handsome and intelligent as me (coughing) or would they be as dumb and lazy as a sloth? I pray not. Please Lord. Hehe
But how am I suppose to go with it when I’m not yet ready to give up playing arcade and games and watching movies and travelling and blah blah blah… I guess I’m not ready yet. The pressure here and there – I’m like a pendulum tossed on one side to the other trying to please, maybe, others and I’m tired. Can’t have the both sides, otherwise I would go static and useless. The best thing would be to swing farther and break the elastic limit of the string that binds me from where I should be. Hmmm it simply means I’m not ready yet. And 28? I don’t feel like one hahaha. I’m not shy of my age but well I think that I don’t think and act like my age. I guess Freud and Skinner would be mad at me for not satisfying my childhood years.

Well, I guess all these rants are due to what I’m feeling now. The best of both worlds. Feeling like in a cloud nine for meeting and conversing with someone special – miss you like crazy LOL – and *sigh* feeling low for someone who strums my pain with his fingers if I may quote Toni Braxton. How do call that feeling?

Chocolates and Paper Roses

the pearly whites that reflects the sunlight
of pure joy that melts my heart
tame the gods that guards my reason
and open the gates of treasures bastion

those sullen eyes of fiery passion
devours the misty fort of repression
those eyes that holds chasten love
and vestibules of sheer compassion

captured by the halo of your embrace
I’ve knotted the stem of succulent cherry
savored the breeze of your silent breathing
and sealed it with a kiss of ardent fervor

but all are chocolates of dark temptations
and paper roses of sweet nothings
a shroud of spectacle that hides the intentions
like Dorian Gray, you lavished on your impression

still I danced with you as the music played
in a masquerade ball of tweaking and charade
‘til we tire ourselves in this rustic game
and wake up at dusk to see you again.