To the Moon, I Wished

I looked at the moon
And wisphered a prayer
With tears in my eyes
I waited for his answer

His serene perfection
Ever so constant
Made me wonder
Did he even listened?

Dark clouds covered
And soon disappeared
With him a twinkling
Sparkling dust, revealed

In a suddden moment
My heart leap with joy
As if I heard his answer
From these lights symphony

Overjoyed, my heart swell
And burst into tears
His lights reflected
With every drop that fell

My heart in pain
Has come to a healing
My troubled mind
Has found its rest

Then a biting cold
Suddenly pinched me
And am awakened
With the moonshadow beside me.

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Before Death

If it is so that my days are numbered
I promised to live it full
Reaching out to share the love
With a smile I shall do it all

Though I yearn to live longer
To see more of the beauty of Creation
In the years I have lived
I had a glimpse of it all

My days are surely numbered…
I shall live each day warming hearts of others
That would swell mine and burst forth
To others, and find joy in living

To my friends who are dear to me
In pain and joy I thank you all
My family – my life and my inspiration
I leave you with blessings and comfort

To acquaintances whom I shared life with
You made me realize that it is indeed possible
And to my love… The love of my life
In time we’ll journey on the same road once again

Leaving this world I wish to see no other face
But of smile and laughter
Of hope that one day we will be reunited
Once more, in a place eternal.

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Underneath It All

Of picture frames and happy face
fixed on the wall
They never seem so lonely then
I can’t believe
Of genuine smile and twinkling eyes
or so, I say
They were all so real, like ther’ve never been
not so sunny days

The color says of happy days
when we were young
There have never been blue and greys
only bright stars
They’re like summer days and autumn skies
and April spring
But have you ever tried to see ‘neath those eyes
what they really mean

And so I say, my dear let’s play
the guessing game
Let’s just pretend you knew me well
you can see everything
Of black and blue and purple hue
of what has been
Or what has been hidden in
the sheets of green

Underneath it all is just pretense
I hope you understand
To see me in beneath those eyes is
a wonderful thing
‘coz most of them see everything
‘cept this truth
Hidden in the shadows of
these dark brown eyes

Of colored hues and black and blue
I am everything
Of autumn hues and summer skies
I’m winter within
Cold and grey my happy days
it is but true
But don’t worry dear, though winter is cold
I am white as snow.

Borrowed

Silver lights
That is all I see
In this corner of the room lit by an artificial light

A music is playing
And my heart beats to its slow rythm
Staring blankly at the ceiling
That turned into a movie screen
That made the past so alive, so real

Wish I could go back in time, I wonder
Back when my innocence was not tarnished
Back when childhood dreams are a joy to achieved
Back when I wanted to be old

I wish I could find the answer to every tomorrow
To this journey in a road unknown
But tomorrow never exist they say
Only today and yesterday

Back to the silver lights that never played
To my unblinking eyes that never strayed
With these thoughts that swayed like a pendulum
I hug my pillow tight
Tighter so I will stay in the present
And ease the biting cold of winter

On my bed I lay alone
Thinking
Just thinking
Of my borrowed life, of my borrowed time.

Take Courage

It is heartwarming to know that someone cares
That someone listens despite who you are
Despite the flaws that you try to hide
But shows up eventually

In the years when you have to take courage
And be strong amidst the piercing eyes of people
It is amazing how you can stand up
In the pool of shame that people think of you

But sad to know that some are not strong enough
For the may have not given enough time
Or space
Or even shelter
For them to be at peace with their hearts
And for once take courage to face the day
Of a world full of hate and hypocrisy

But you are not alone
For I may be on the other side of the world
But our hearts are as one
Beating the same language that they can’t even understand
And when they can’t follow its rhythm
They start to shoot arrows and push daggers
For we are not one
With them

If they could only understand
If they could only feel the way we feel
If they could only be in our shoes
If they could only be

But they can’t
But they aren’t
So they will never do
They will never be.

So let us not waste tears for sorrow but for joy
Rejoicing the day that we can survive
And live the way we are
Who we are
For who knows when our time has come
And may God bless it
We are glorified with Him in heaven
For the faith
And the fruit of it
And when it’s all done.

Take courage, you are not alone.

on missing Kanazawa

It’s been more than half a year. Still the memories are made fresher by every captured moment glued on a photo album. They jumped out of the piece of paper and enliven in my mind making me smile and sigh at the same time. If ever I get the chance, I would go back again and relive the memories.

in front of 21st Century Museum of Contemporary Arts

Japan is such a wonderful place. But my memories of Kanazawa, a humble capital city of Ishikawa Prefecture in the Chubu region, will always be remembered. Kanazawa had been close to my heart since then that I cried when we are to leave for Tokyo on our last day of homestay.

leaving Kanazawa for Tokyo

Macha flavored chocolates awaits for me every time I go home from school or from an AFS activity. Watching the seagulls frolicking on Asano River over my bedroom window is such a joy to the heart. And who can forget those little kids I see that look like an anime character every time I wake up on a freezing morning as they head to school. The enchanting Kenrokuen Garden made majestic the Maeda Castle on the background. The gaiety that surrounds the silent walls of Higashi Geisha District, the pageantry of the Noh Theater and the modernity of the Museum of Contemporary Arts.

How do you like your food serve with gold? Yes, Kanazawa supplies 99% of Japan’s gold leaf demand. You can even eat them straight. Japanese believe it’s good for the body.

Kanazawa is a home where tradition and modernity is combined. Populated with such wonderful people and great food, I would always love to go back and live there if I can.

my host family at a Gold Leaf house

More than that, I am missing my host family, my Otoosan and Okaasan and my brother whom I used to exchange ideas with and share my learning and the culture that I brought right on their doorsteps. And my AFS Family with whom I have spent these memories with, it will always be a joy to see each other again.

JENESYS Batch 4 Country Mix

Farewell to Broken Heart

broken


Let raindrop fall from dark August skies
And quench the thirst that my soul so desire
Flood the rivers and overflow to the field
Of my heart that has been the living battlefield

Let no man guise’s deceive me once again
‘tis been a masquerade I don’t want to begin
Let me stitch my cut and not yield to the pain
For in pain I know not love will gain

Stumble and fall but not once and for all
Let this circumstance teach us a lesson we call
Avoid the vanity where lies hypocrisy
To submit is a joy fleeting it will always be

Come oh soothing wind and dry this misery
Carry the memories that are painful to me
Rejoice oh mighty sun for I am now free
Now let me start again to where I should be

The beauty of a raindrop from dark August skies
Is a beauty to see now to my eyes
It calms my inner being and rejoices in my light
Learned a precious wisdom, now I wait in pure delight.