Ode to You

You made a poet out of me
Scribbled notes about you I see
I made sure that each line rhymes
To follow the beat of this heart of mine

I would lay down a great canvass
The painter I am is unleashed at last
These thousand words would burst to life
A picture with you and what I’d be like

You are the music of my lyrics
The melody of my written words
There may be silence, or maybe codas
But I will put bridges and repeat chorus

I would sculpt you in finest marbles
And parade you in clearest crystals
Because I want the world to see
How much you mean to me

I may have all there is in art
But this now I have to start
Will a song with me you’ll sing
If I strum the guitar strings?

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All is a Lie

Can you read my thoughts?
I don’t know
I’m afraid
Afraid that I might fail
To meet you somewhere I don’t know
My mind can’t conceive
I’m trying to believe
That you just love freedom
But you loved freedom
Too much
Too much, that you wanted freedom
When all I wanted was you.

Can you read my thoughts?
No.
You can’t.
Coz when I’m here waiting
You are there somewhere
Seeking
Flirting
Leaving.

My heart screams
My mind dreams
But they were never answered
And will never be.

I said: “I love you”
I never lied.

You said: “I love you”
But you never tried.

Tyranny

I know how your skin feels like
the valleys and contours so treacherous
a bite won’t hurt, but can I ask for more?
For too much you would poison me

You hear the sound of my pleading
as your grip tightens on my soft skin
the moans of suffering that chokes
the life out of this helpless soul

I taste the sweetness of your cherry lips
only after my skin reddened from your beating
only when I feel no more
under the chains that only you commands

you’ll see me creeping, beg for more
not of your whipping but of mercy
as shadows leave the darkened hall
I lie dripping on the floor.

The Power of Hug

I do not like being hugged, most especially in public except when the situation requires me to do so.

As I reflected on the past events of my life, I realized that the moments that I really felt secure and at peace are those times when somebody hugged me. The feeling is ethereal. Like I’m in a solitary place enclosed in a cocoon far from danger. As long as I feel the arms wrapped around me, I feel like a child sleeping soundly. Thus, I seem to establish a connection like that of a mother and child to the person hugging me. So much energy and emotion I absorbed I’m afraid I wasn’t able to transmit mine.

For this, I’ll always be in gratitude to them.

The Element

when fever alights and this dire passion
loses its heat, consumed to ashes
the seething pain burned by flames
is a remnant of the past washed by waters

waters of mire – the blurry visions
seeping in my veins so cold as steel
hardened by time, numbing the brain
even air’s caress I could not feel

yes, this air of hope is there no more
to quench the thirst of this hardened soul
no dew to the earth to loosen its crack
only I am but a prey in the eyes of an owl

this fissured earth no words can heal
no precious gems can it ever share
nor life to give among its valleys and hills
but through the love you willfully spare

it is a wonder what this love can do
to this burnt passion and gasping hope
‘tis like the waters that quench the earth
the thinnest thread that would not choke.

For the Love of Spanish

On my way to the airport, I overheard a mother-daughter conversation behind me in the van. They were speaking in mix languages – local dialect, English but mostly Spanish. My ears just couldn’t resist listening to their conversation in Spanish trying to understand what they’re talking about – which most of it I understand.

Their conversation made me smile. “I really have to pursue formal education of the Spanish language!” I said to myself. I used to listen to Spanish songs; studied idiot’s guide to Spanish and some interactive CD’s, but my knowledge is not enough. I can compose sentences and paragraphs not without grammatical error. How can I go and live in my dream place when in the first place I don’t know how to speak the language? Haha. So, I promise myself to take Spanish language this summer.

I want to live in Barcelona. I don’t know but this Spanish thing has some connection deep in me that I wanted so much to be in that place. I think my soulmate lives there that is why I am not married yet. Hahaha. Or maybe because of my past (I’m not talking about reincarnation hehe).Of course, that includes the most romantic language (at least for me) and the arrogant people. Haha.  A foreign exchange student of mine from Colombia once said, it’s better to live in Latin American countries than in Spain. She said they are aristocrats, arrogant and proud. They feel that they are a superior race. Well, I can’t blame her. There is so much in the history of the Spanish people who made them what they are now.

So here’s my resolution:

  1. Take formal Spanish education this summer.
  2. Study religiously the Spanish books I bought. (that is if I have enough time)
  3. Practice speaking and writing in Spanish. And,
  4. Establish connection with online Spanish-speaking friends.

Hopefully, this year I can already speak Spanish well.

Any other possible suggestions?